Power: alternatively titled 'LISTEN TO MAH PROBLEMS"

Yes, I'm going to be all self indulged. As we know, blogging is never self indulgent in any form, so this should be some really groundbreaking stuff. 


My parents are divorced, and my father's current long-term partner (woman, not man, just to clear that up) is, in layman's terms, bat-shit-fuck-nuts-fruity-loopy crazy. Not in the fun way either. 
She has never taken to my sister or me, and particularly considering that I am the younger by several years, she reserves a special place in her black twisted heart for hating me. 
We have come to a point where she tolerates me. Sort of. What I mean by tolerates is that she says hello to me. In recent years I sort of gave up trying to make conversation with her as she'd cut it off as soon as was possible, generally by turning to whomever she was next to and starting a conversation with them. Yet in more recent times her thing is to actually avert her gaze from my person. 


Last year, and I will remember this until I die, she actually addressed a room in the third person - I was the only occupant - rather than directly address me. A handy trick if ever you want to really disconcert someone. 


So I was thinking about this. Where is the power here? In the woman who, in the words of my (eloquent) sister 'must suck like a 'Puerto Rican hooker', or me?
I came to the conclusion that in fact, I am the one here who holds the most power, as I inspire such hatred, and such fear, that she literally can't bring herself to look at me. In her crazy messed up mind, I am someone of such menace, that she wants to pretend I'm not there to make herself feel better. 
Despite this, the fact that someone just ignored your 586314th attempt to be courteous to them is pretty soul-crushing, particularly when you're attempting to conform to a level of etiquette, and not actually call them on the fact that they're a massive douchebag (obviously also not descending to their level is additionally factored into this).


So let us leave this blog post with the question, where is power? How can you determine who has it and who doesn't, and what is it that gives one person power?
Ok so that was actually more like 'the many questions'.
And perhaps more importantly, does having such power over another person mean you shouldn't feel like crap when they're an asshole to you?